Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs.
Why did the fly never land on the computer? Because he was afraid of the world wide web!
What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.
What is totally funny and makes a dog itch? The Flea Stooges!
What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it? Bugs Bunny.
What goes 99 thump, 99 thump, 99 thump? A centipede with a wooden leg.
What do you call two ants that run away to get married? Ant-elopes!
What’s worse than a worm in your apple? Half a worm.
What kind of fly has a frog in its throat? A horse fly!
What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant? French flies.
What do you call a bee’s back? It’s bee-hind!
Why can you never trust spiders? Because they post stuff on the web.
What insect is an arithmetic insect? A mosquito! They add to misery, subtract from pleasure, divide the attention and multiply quickly!
What happened to the bed bugs that fell in love? They got married in the spring.
What kind of place should you never take a dog? To the flea market.
What do you call a musical insect? A humbug.
What do you get if you throw butter? A butterfly.
Why did the bee get married? Because he finally found his honey.
How did the man start up his flea collar business? He started from scratch.
What do you get when you eat caterpillars? Butterflies in your stomach!
Patron: Waiter, what’s this Praying Mantis doing in my soup? Waiter: Saying grace.
I walked into biology lab and saw my lab partner dissecting an insect. I told him, “I think your fly is open.”
I hate insect puns. They bug me.
I’ve been a beekeeper for years and when my crush said “It’s me or it’s those nasty insects, make up your mind!” At first I didn’t think she was serious. Then I saw her face. Now I’m a bee-leaver.
I once knew a guy that liked to cross breed insects for fun. I liked the guy at first, but eventually I got tired of his ant ticks.
So the Apollo missions found insects on the moon. Lunaticks.
“Doctor! Doctor! I keep seeing an insect buzzing around me!” “Don’t worry, it’s just a bug going around.”
